Thursday, February 09, 2006

Sobering thoughts

Right now Pat (my wife) is in Los Angeles, visiting her parents. We found out about ten days ago that Pat's Mom has cancer in her neck. According to the doctors, there is no effective treatment for the type she has. We are all rather in shock over this, as Mom has not been one to be sick very often. She is home from the hospital now, but she has 24 hour hospice care to help her with her breathing and other medical needs. She has a tracheotomy, i.e. an opening in her neck to allow her to breathe since the tumor has constricted her airway. That has to be cleaned out regularly, which is one of the things the hospice care people help her with. She can't eat solid food either, and is on a liquid diet from what I understand.

Pat tells me that Mom is doing OK, is up and around the house, helped with dinner last night. But I can tell from the tone of Pat's voice on the phone that things aren't exactly rosy there. Pat's Dad is legally blind due to macular degeneration, and Mom has been his eyes for a couple of years now. His hearing has deteriorated too, but otherwise he is in good health. Still, he isn't in the best of shape to deal with Mom's illness. Pat has been helping with errands and stuff in the couple of days she has been there this week. Pat comes home this Saturday; next weekend, she and I and our son Ben will fly back to L.A. so we can all visit them for a couple of days. Then we will probably try to go again in March when Ben has spring break from school.

I have not been especially close to my in-laws, although I like them a lot. We have lived in Texas for 15 years while they have been in California, so I haven't bonded with them as well as I might have if we had lived closer all this time. So it is not nearly as hard on me as it must be on Pat to deal with this sudden slap in the face by Mortality. I want to be as sensitive and supportive as I can be during this time, and I will do my utmost to be there for Pat, her parents, her brother, Ben, and everyone else affected by this. If you are reading this and have any prayers, thoughts, healing vibes, positive energy, or anything like that to send to us, we would be most appreciative. Thanks.

1 comment:

  1. I'll send Pat my best postive thoughts for her family. This is going to be a tough time for her so be extra caring. My Dad died last year and I'm just now starting to feel normal again. It's even worse when it's something that is so out of control like neck cancer.

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